Monday, April 1, 2013

Meeting Dr "McDreamy"

Guess I should share an experience I had just this past Friday.  Mommy told me that it was time to meet the man that would be making sure I grow up to be big and healthy.  She said his name is Dr Fly, but I heard her tell someone else that she thinks he is also Dr "McDreamy."  At first I had no idea what that meant.  But then he walked into the room at his office and wowser, I now know what mommy was saying.

But before I get into that, I guess I should back up and tell you about a little incident that took place a few moments before that.  Ok...don't judge, but it was my very first visit to what they call a "Vet's office."  Something inside me told me to be scared as soon as I heard those 2 words.  Not sure why, but it did.  So mommy and daddy loaded me in the car and I immediately got excited.  Again...for some reason, I thought the car meant we were headed to the nearest park so I could romp about and play.

But imagine my surprise when we pulled into a parking lot and there was this scary looking brick building with other dogs coming out wearing funny things on their heads or some looking like their butts had been prodded and stuck. I knew right away, this was not going to be a fun place for me. So mommy and daddy had to pick me up and carry me in because I refused to voluntarily cross the threshold and enter the den of terror.

Daddy tried to comfort me and tell me it was going to be ok, but that had no effect.  I tried to let them know of my disapproval immediately by dropping a small poopie on the floor as soon as we entered.  I thought for sure that at least mommy would be horrified and embarrassed enough to turn around and take me home. But no!  So then I felt I had to try another approach and hide under some chairs.  Maybe out of sight out of mind?  But no!  Some straggly-haired mutt gave away my location after he came into the same room I was in.  He looked upset from something that had taken place behind another set of doors and I felt like he was just taking out on me by sniffing under the chair and making everyone else look at me.  I gave him a verbal "what-for" but by then it was too late.  Daddy grabbed me and set me on his lap.

Well...I was running out of defensive options.  Daddy was doing a pretty good job of trying to calm me down.  But then the last straw happened.  Some really chatty guy (even more chatty than my daddy) kept looking at me and asking questions about me and then made an aggressive move to try to touch me.  The nerve! Well that was it.  The only option left in my arsenal was to do something that I was positive would get me a quick ticket out of there and back home where I could run to the safety of my crate.

As the man touched my nose, I slowly started to pee-pee on my daddy's leg.  It took daddy a minute, but I soon heard him tell mommy, "My leg is warm, I think she just peed."  You were right daddy...I peed on your leg, now get me home!

But again...NO!!  I was in shock.  I thought that there would be no way he would want to stick around now that his thigh was soaked in puppy pee.  But he and mommy were determined to get me in to see Dr Fly.  I think it was just so mommy could get a peak at the good Dr again.  I tried two more times.  Daddy stood up to carry me through the set of even scarier doors and I tried again my drizzling some pee down the front of his sweater.  Didn't work.  He then handed me to a stranger who took me away for a moment and sat me down on some cold metal looking thing and then made some comment about my weight.  How rude!  So I decided to let her have it too and I peed down the front of her scrubs.  I knew I wasn't going home anytime soon so I honestly was doing that just to show how unhappy I was.

So that is really my story.  To sum it up, Dr Fly came in.  He has really nice hands, if you know what I mean.  He was cuter than I had pictured.  Overall everyone was very nice to me, but how was I to know that ahead of time?

And I learned a valuable lesson.  Never pee on the person who you then have to ride home with in the car.  Daddy stunk!


  1. Poor little Maude..Doctors are scary. Although I remember meeting Dr. Fly once and he was pretty handsome.. I'm sure she'll warm up to him. ;)

  2. Maude is so flippin' cute! Love the story :)

    1. Aww...thank you and thanks for reading. This is Maude's Daddy by the way. She has yet to learn to type. :)

  3. I think this is going to be a fun blog to follow. I'm sure our mom would think Dr. McDreamy was nice looking also. Much love from your new dachshunds friends from Alabama!
    Sophie & Lucy (and our mom, Lisa)

    1. Maude's daddy says thank you for reading and commenting :) And Maude says hi to Sophie and Lucy. :)

  4. Hey Maude,

    It's so great to meet you buddy!! Love how you've perfected that 'what?' look in the top photo!

    I'm always getting mistaken for an Old English Sheepdog even though I have a tail! :)

    I'm looking forward to following your tails/tales as you grow up! :)

    Big wags,

    Your pal Snoopy :)